a moment to refine...

I was listening to Pandora radio the other day and a song came on that I had never heard before. It had a line in it that made me think ...."I guess were all one phone call from our knees". The line struck me as strangely familiar because lately phone calls have not been great. I have become fond of the art of text messaging, you can read it without any sort of embarrassment from the emotional reaction you can give. Plus, there are times that reading something makes it seem less real than when you hear it from someones voice.

I find myself continually focusing on the negative, even though I don't consider myself a negative person. I also focus on the things i can't change rather than the things I can, even though i consider myself a pretty logical person.

It struck me today when a dear friend said something really nice to me. He told me I was one of the greatest people he knew and then immediately reassured me that he wasn't 'blowing smoke', which struck me that he knew me better than I thought. It also made me think that maybe people know that about me, that I need immediate reassurance because I tend to doubt myself.

My question...how do you change that? It has to be more than a promise to your facebook status to look through life with a different view, it has to have more action, more guarantee. I could write it, I could tell someone but it has to involve doing. I want to take action, control and responsibility for my life. I don't want to be the dramatic head case that people feel they can't talk to. Not that person who cries at the drop of a hat or brings drama to every conversation. I want to be someone people want around in more ways than one. I guess before that can even happen I need to believe that it is true. Believe what people tell me, good or bad, and take it to heart. Especially when they are people I trust and cherish.

So as far as the song goes, "She got a call today, one out of the grey. And when the smoke cleared, it took her breath away. I couldn't believe, that this could happen to me. I guess were all one phone call from our knees." I think the thing that is missing is that every call that makes us fall is an opportunity to pick ourselves back up, dust ourselves off and appreciate what we have, who we are...and maybe just leave a little room to refine.

All the best.... Lamb

(PS... Thanks E!)

The Eternal Monday

I started to think this Sunday about the many things that I promise myself on Sunday nights...always saying that I will begin Monday. Monday feels like a good day to 'start' something. Part of it is that I am a planner...and when things are not planned I don't feel entirely comfortable about them. So I did want to start this Sunday night by trying to hold true to one of those goals which is to actually blog. It sounds lame...and if you are reading this looking for some profound truth, you -probably won't find it. It is however, a way to get thoughts off my mind, out into the world and maybe make you laugh (at or with me) or cry or something. In order to get some inspiration I started listening to some music. I happened to find Van Morrison on the internet and began listening to into the mystic which I always love. it is one of those songs that makes you want to trust in life and float into the unknown.

I am going to try to carry that attitide through this new school year. I don't know what is coming but I am excited for the new year and I am just going to sail into the unknown. I am going to do my best to learn about life, learn about myself, become a better teacher, a better friend, a better person and be happy and fulfilled. I am going to learn not to sweat the small stuff, read more, laugh more, cry less and smile even when I don't feel like it.

One of the greatest things about being a teacher is that each year you get to start fresh. You get to trash the things that didn't work, revamp the things that needed refining, leave the things that seemed to be amazing. You get to inspire more and learn more and teach more. You get to try again and try new things. It is pretty amazing.

Happy 2009-2010 school year to all. Parents, teachers, students and everyone no matter how you fit in. Oh, and here is to a happy Monday. Because I believe instead of hoping for a new beginning just living each day, including Monday, to fullest will be a good way to spend time. Also, start goals whenever I can...not matter the day!

Karen

Leadership means Selflessness...

Recently at CADA camp the adviser's council spoke on selflessness and here is what we said...

Our word is selflessness. It is something that as advisers we believe is vital but also something that we are continually happy and impressed to see in all of our students every day.

Leadership is about what is best for the school - not the individual. It is about a place to put your pride aside and realize that the individual doesn't come first, the whole group does. Leadership is about making a personal connection to all kinds of people no matter what background. This connection comes from masking activities that fit all kinds of different people. If you make Leadership all about you, they won't respect you but if you make it about them, they will. Remember you have to serve before you lead, you have to give rather than take, you have to make it inclusive instead of exclusive. Selflessness in Leadership means knowing you have done the right thing in your heart and mind, with no need for gratitude or reward.

The beauty of selflessness is that even though it seems it is always about others, it comes full circle and benefits you. It helps you continually grow to be a better person...

Because like Ghandi said "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others".

All my faith,

Karen

A week to remember...

About a month ago I decided to delete my previous blog. It wasn't all that impressive to anyone including myself and it began to become an electronic version of my journal that I ended up only updating every few months. When I deleted it I decided I wasn't going to start again until something had happened that inspired or moved me. Since that past 10 days did that I thought this was a perfect time...

It started with another amazing trip to CADA CAMP at the University of Santa Barbara, California. More kids, different advisers and one assistant principal could have proved to create a different dynamic, which it did, but that dynamic was nothing short of amazing.

Then I was back for one day (which I slept through most of) in order to recuperate.

Then I left for camping at Twin Lakes until Sunday. (Camping would be interesting for Lamb since I take 2 showers a day, hate to be dirty, enjoy AC all to much, love my iPhone, and haven't been camping in 5 or 6 years).

Over these trips I have come to many realizations I would like to share with you:

1. Ralphy the dog is loved by all (and it also turns out he is a good camper).

2. Silent football needs to be played in the light.

3. Being a Polar Bear is awesome (even if it happens in the garage when you have returned home and are unloading the truck).

4. The Riekers are geniuses (record Polar Bear time).

5. Every campsite needs a shady out cove for naps.

6. Camping food can be better than what I make at home.

7. Edward is still the best.

8. Teenagers are amazing...they can drive you crazy but they are smart, funny, courageous, sensible, patient, kind and driven....I love my job.

9. Joe, who I consider one of my best friends, is the perfect CADA partner.

10. People are capable of doing anything. They just have to put themselves out there and try something new.

11. A mistake is only an error if you choose not to learn from it.

12. Jill has convinced me that are in fact things that are funny because they are not.

13. Paula is the most graceful athlete I have ever met and this includes rope swings into lakes.

14. Many different people can pull off the same bikini top.

15. If you ever get to pick your last meal, you should choose every course and make it interesting.

16. Ralphy is a dog, margarita is a drink. No wait...

17. The bottom of the shower is a badge of honor when returning from camping...because it is dirty.

18. The best thing about being gone for 10 days is that your bed seems all the more comfortable and your DVR has many things to watch.

19. Quotes from Will Ferrell movies (especially Anchorman) are always great crowd pleasers.

20. I have a feeling that sometime in the future there will be a dog rescue ranch, where ESPN is taped, a kick ass coffee house exists, a floral shop exists, where we have our own on site firefighters, someone who handles all of our investments, that has a lake that we can sail on, where some people only lived when they weren't traveling for the peace corp.
it will be called Warrpclraff (figure that one out).

*** BONUS... my friends are the most amazing people you have ever met, no question. I love them all dearly and love the fun times together.

Thank you so much for calling on my Mr. Commissioner Sir...

Lamb